Mero Degree Holder Choro.... [Nepali Poem]

Title: मेरो Degree Holder छोरो.......
Genre: व्यंग्य [Comedy]

आयो छोरो आयो

नाकले धुँवा फुस फुस छोरदै आयो

हाथमा Marlboro चेपेर आयो

आयो छोरो आयो ||

टाटे पांग्रे केस बनाएर

जुम्राको गुड बोकेर आयो,

कानमा कुन्डल र आँखामा काजल

छोरि जस्तो भएर आयो ||

पढन भनि सहर पसेको छोरो

आज धेरै पढेर आयो,

भोलि को घर को सहारा बन्न

छोरो घर फर्केर आयो ||

आहा,

कति खुशी आमा हेर

झनै खुशी छन् बुवा

आखिर यत्रो सालको मेहनत पछि

छोरो Graduate भएर आयो ||

तर यो के ?

छोरो त ढुंग ढुंग खट्टू गनाउदैछ

खाएर आयो कि पिएर आयो

तर खट्टूको गन्ध लिएर आयो ||

नबोली कोठामा पसेर सुत्यो

"छोरा" भनि बोलाए बाउले

"Plz dont disturb!" भन्ने उत्तर आयो

अवाक्क थिए आमा-बाउ

बिचरा छोरा के भएर आयो ||

बाउ ले पुलुक्कै आमा लै हेरे

त्यो हेराई मा डर थियो,

लाज थियो, सरम थियो,

घुटुक्कै थुक निल्दै बाउले भने

"यो लठुवा के भएर आयो ?"

खट्टू को राप ले हो कि ?

मायालु को चाप ले हो ?

छोरो त निदाएछ,

कि Degree को धाक ले हो ||

Graduate छोरो स्वाँ स्वाँ गर्दै सुत्यो

जुरुक्कै फेरी निन्द्राबाट उठ्यो

अचानक Newton's Law को पो याद आयो कि

कि नया Invention को Idea आयो

तर छोरो फुत्त बाहिर निस्की, छादनु सम्म छादयो

Khowledge Overflow भाको भन्छ

तर Knowledge त ठुस ठुस Honey Bee गनाउछ ?

लड़बरिन्दै छोरो फेरी भित्र पस्छ

भुइँ मा फ्याततै लडी निदाऊछ ||||

सायद बेसी परेर हो कि

छोरो को आँखा सुनिएको,

रात भरि को Project ले हो कि

छोरो को hips सुकेको,

Semester को खटाई ले हो कि

नसै नसा भएको,

केस काट्न नभ्याएर होला

Einsten जस्तो पालेको ||

यो सोचि बाउले ठुलो सास फेरे

सुकेको छाती फुलाए,

सास अड्केछ बुदोको

झन्डै राम-नाम सत्य भए ||

छोरो दिनै Village Tour मा जान थाल्यो

बिहे बटुल जोरै धाउन थाल्यो,

यो Degree Holder छोरोको व्यवहार देखि

बाउलाई One son को tension ले पिर पार्यो ||

शास्त्र पढने बाटो हगुवा भन्ने त सुनेको थिए

College पढनेले आँगनमा छि-छि गर्यो,

पढेर ठुलो भै आमा-बाउलाई हेर्छ भन्ने

बाउको सपना पनि कहिले मर्यो मर्यो ||

तर जे होस्,

छोरो समाज सेवा धेरै गर्छ,

मरौ परौ पर्यों  यदि गाउमा भने

तेरह दिनमा मात्रै घर फर्किन्छ,

A trial, K pet र के-के तिर

जोड सिपालु भएछ ||

घरि पंचायततिर उठ्छु भन्छ

घरि गनेउला पाल्छु भन्छ

घरि खसी व्यापार गरि

पैसा अलिक कमाउनु छ भन्छ ||

अब बाउले एउटा बुहारी खोज्दैछन्,

यो छोरोलाई तह लाउनु सक्ने

Village Tour तिर गए खुट्टा भाच्ने

खट्टू खाएमा गाला पड्काउने

बरु संगै बसेर अलि अलि सडकाउने

नाक र कान छोडी अरुतिर पनि कुण्डल लाउने

साड़ी लाएर हिडेमा अल्झेर लडी हाल्ने

Jeans र Top मा नै Comfortable भन्ने

लांग्सा [ox], फाक्सा [pig], बुड़ो भैसी केहि नछोडने

लटर-पटर English पनि पड्काई हाल्ने

गाऊका सबै केटाहरुलाई राखी बाधि

"दादा" भनि हात समातेर हिड्ने,

तपाई को तिर छ कि

छ भने छ्यास्सै Miss Call गरिदिनु होला है ||

Note: Meant for fun. If this relates to someone living then what can I do? :P

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Oppa Gangnam Style......

Many times I had seen my brother running around our house shouting 'Gangnam Style.....' and posing like a monkey and I thought this guy seriously needs treatment. For me Gangnam Style was like 'kun chara ko naam ho?' as I had never heard of it before.

One fine day, I was there on the road trying to take pictures of two dogs making out... ;) And suddenly they stuck... And I was there with a camera in hand laughing like anything over the condition of those two dogs. And I didn't realize an aunt was coming behind me. I turned around, on seeing her felt very guilty and hastily pretended to be taking the pics of the hills and skies.... 

By the time she crossed, the dogs also vanished from sight and I sat there looking at those photos.... Suddenly I hear 'Oppa.... Gangnam Style....' and I thought alas my brother is ill again and glanced down. There he was, on our courtyard, seeing me, started dancing again cause he knew that I would be taking his monkey-pose pics too.

I came back to my room, wondering is my brother really getting ill or am I too backward to know what is Gangnam Style.... Then I googled it and then I realized what it actually was. Soon, I was watching it on youtube (though waiting for about half an hour to get it buffered). Later, two voices were heard around our house, 'Oppa Gangnam Style....' and two figures dancing, now my parents are thinking that we both need treatment.

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CBSE Results 2013 - Race to score 90+ percentage!

After the CBSE results were declared, all newspapers & Facebook pages started flooding with the names and photographs of the toppers followed by the 95+ percentage that they scored and the wave of congratulation messages followed. It is really great that students nowadays are giving their everything to reach the figure which in our times was a distant dream.

I still wonder, how can one score 98.6%? That is still impossible for me.... In our times scoring 60+ percentage was something great. We would see students making merry and partying at that score. 

Time is changing so rapidly. Competition is increasing at a pace that cannot be defined. The intelligence of an student is measured by the percentage that he/she scores in his academics.

But on the run for scoring 90+ percentage, one thing lingers in my mind. I remember the dialogue of the famous 3 Idiot movie, 'dost fail ho jaye to bura lagta hai... lekin agar dost top kar jaye to aur bhi bura lagta hai....' [We become sad if our friends fail, but we get sadder if our friends top....] How Ironic!!

I have seen unhappy students after scoring 88 or 89 percentage. They and their parents are unhappy because their child couldn't score 90+ or the child of his neighbor won him by 2 percentage. This is really disheartening.

I wonder what will be the scenario when our child will be facing his CBSE board exams. Scoring 100% would be the trend I guess and the one who don't score cent percent would be treated like failures. 

Nowadays parents send their children to tutions from their lower grades, even class 2 or 3 students go to tutions. Coachings, I feel is for the students who are poor in studies but it has become a trend nowadays. You cannot deny the fact that it has made students dependable on others. And some parents and coachers[one who give tutions] treat it as if it is compulsory for all the students. What gets into the mind of these students is that they start developing the habit of depending upon tutions rather than paying attention in class. They start thinking that even if they don't understand the lesson in class, they can learn in their tutions. This habit gets into the students and grows exponentially every year.

Yes, indeed there are some students, who without the pressure from their parents to score big, without coachings score great. They are the students who should be highlighted. The students who are from poor family who cant afford some expensive coachings, they don't have all the time in the world to prepare for the exams, they are to be praised.

I have seen students from villages, as i grew up in a village, students who wake up early in the morning, go to forest to collect fooder or firewood, do household chores, no private coachings, still manage to pass board with flying colors. Though they don't score 98% or even 80% but they and their family are happy that they cleared the examination. But the sad part is that even after clearing the board exam, they cannot afford going to college because of  the financial condition of the family.

They end up either becoming a farmer like their parents did, or the small time contractors. Some of them really want to study, to become a graduate, perhaps the first graduate from the family but alas they cant. There is something called government aided scholarship, but who is there to tell them that something like this exists? And a large section ofthat too is reserved for SC/STs. Only if reservation was done on the basis of economic condition of the people, so many of them would be benefited. Now, we all know who enjoys the benefit!!

Indeed a heartfelt congratulation to all the students who cleared the CBSE exam. But moreover congratulations to those who cleared it without expensive coachings, without some subject teachers in schools and without the late night coffees from their parents during exam days.

Note: This are the personal views of the author. Not meant to harm the sentiments of any!

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School jana mana lagyo..... [Nepali Article]

Title: स्कुल जान मन लाग्यो 

अचानकै पुरानो याद ताजा भई आयो

फेरी मलाई स्कुल जान मन लाग्यो ,

फेरी सेतो शर्ट, निलो प्यान्ट

कालो जुत्ता र टाई लगाई ,

खाता चेपि हिड्न मन लाग्यो ,

अचानकै फेरी मलाई स्कुल  जान मन लाग्यो ||

त्यै बिहानको घण्टी, साथी भाईको जमघट

घचेटा घचेट र फेरी एसेम्बली ,

त्यै 'प्रभु तिमी' प्रार्थना र 'जन-गण'

सुर मा सुर मिलाई गाउने इच्छा जाग्यो ,

किन हौ आज मलाई स्कुल  जान पो मन लाग्यो ||

छड्के आँखाले उसलाई चियाउदै हेर्दै

कागजको डल्लाले फेरी हिर्काउदै ,

कहिले उसले लजाउदै पुलुक्कै हेर्दा को आनन्द

आज फेरी गुटमुटीएर आयो ,

अचानकै फेरी मलाई स्कुल जान मन लाग्यो ||

टिचर नआउदा टेबल ठटाई  गीत गाएको

कागजको हावा जहाज बनाई उडाको ,

कुनै एउटा साथीको सबै मिलि खिल्ली गरेको

सबै पलहरु हुरी जस्तो बनि फर्की आयो ,

किन हौ आज मलाई स्कुल  जान पो मन लाग्यो ||

बुकको सिरानी लगाई सुतेको ,

घरि घरि हावा खानु टोइलेट धाएको ,

त्यो डेस्कमा अनेक थरि कोरेको

साथी भाईको देखि होमे वोर्क चोरेको ,

त्यो ब्यर्थको डर, त्यो वास्तविक खुशी

त्यो Original हाँसो ,

आज फेरी बाँचेर हेर्ने इच्छा जाग्यो

अचानकै फेरी मलाई स्कुल  जान मन लाग्यो ||

कहिले छुट्टिको घण्टी लाग्छ भन्ने त्यो उथुल-पुथुल ,

प्लिक प्लिके(Digital) घडी मा आँखा ,

भोकले कराई रहेको भुड़ी ,

टंग-टंग गर्दाको त्यो रमनय अनुभूति ,

ओहो, सब्दले कहाँ हुन्छ र बर्णन ?

त्यो त बाँचेर हेर्दा मात्रै थाहा हुन्छ ,

मलाई फेरी त्यो दुनियामा फर्किन मन लाग्यो

किन हौ आज मलाई स्कुल  जान पो मन लाग्यो ||

Card board बोकि exam गर्नु गएको

सबै Question फेरि जानेकै आएको,

त्यो हरियो चौरमा बसि गफ हाँकेको ,

छेउ-छाउ  केटि देखे फेरि अलिक Over-smart भाको ,

दुइ पन्ना को Love letter लेखि पठाको ,

साथमा एउटा Dairy Milk पनि हालेको ,

त्यो Friendship को कार्ड, Birthday को कार्ड पाउँदा को खुशी

आज को SMS र Friend Request मा कहाँ छ र ?

मलाई [त्यो] पुरानो दिन फेरि बाँच्ने रहर जाग्यो

अचानकै फेरी मलाई स्कुल  जान मन लाग्यो ||

फेरि सुन्दा त,

नेपाली पड़ाउने गणेश सर  पनि खस्नु भएछ ,

Civics पड़ाउने डी. बी. सर पनि ,

फेरि सी. पी. सरको त ट्रान्सफर भयो रे

अरु-अरु गुरु-गुरुमाको पनि ,

पन्त सर त रीटायर भई सक्नु भएछ

हिन्दीको निरा मेम पनि ,

अब त स्कुल पुरै नँया भई सकेछ ,

घन्टी लाउने प्रेम दाजुपनि बुड़ो भई सकेछ ,

हामीले पर्यावरण दिवसमा रोपेको रुख

कति ठुलो भएछ ,

त्यो सँगै बेन्चमा बस्ने साथी

दुइटा नानीको बाऊ भएछ ,

कोइ गाडीको मालिक भएछ ,

कसैले बिल्डिंग ठराई सकेछ ,

कसै ड्रग्स चेपि आँखा रातो बनाई

नाचिने झैँ गरि हिडी रहेछ

कसै पुलिस भए, कसै IRB भएछ

सबै आफ्नो-आफ्नो लगानीमा लागेछ ||

कसैमा त्यो पुरानो साथी देख्दिन म

समय सँगै सबै परिवर्तन भई सकेछ ,

एसो हेर्दा त म पनि निकै बदलिएछु

दाह्री-जुँगा फुल्न लागेछ ,

तर जे-होस मलाई त्यहि पुरानो साथी-भाई भेट्ने इच्छा जाग्यो ,

मलाई फेरी एकपल्ट स्कुल जान मन लाग्यो

मलाई फेरी एकपल्ट स्कुल जान मन लाग्यो ||

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